Dear Britt and Family, Hoping you can all feel Nicholas' love from that place beyond time and that this sad time passes quickly and gently for you. Joeys mom, Jill
52 weeks / Britt H.S. (His Mum )
Thursday, March 15th, 2007, was the worst day of my life. 52 weeks ago today.....I love & miss you so much, Nick. Life isn't getting any easier, it is just different, so different, without you. Close
It's been almost one year since you died, Nick, and I love & miss you SO much! Each day is close to unbearable for me, and I often get through by the skin of my teeth. You suffered so much pain & hopelessness, and I can only pray that you are at PEACE now-----watching over all of us, especially your infant son, brother, stepbrother, & little sisters. They miss you, too.
Emma put on a Keith Urban tune the other day---she has inherited your ability to run electronic stuff----and she started to cry. I asked her what was wrong, and she told me that she is sad because she "Hasn't seen Nick in a really long time".
We will all be out to Maplegrove next Saturday.....I'll bring you some flowers.......you are such a handsome guy, Nick, and EVERYONE always tells me that--EVERYONE!!!!
Dear Nick---Today is Valentine's Day, and I think about and miss you ALL the time. Tomorrow will be 11 months since you died.....tomorrow is also Papa Don's birthday.
I will go visit you at the cemetary later this afternoon.
Received an optimistic phone call yesterday, Son. You know what it's about.....thank you for 'listening' to me, and helping this wish come true. Love ya lots-- Mum
10 Months / Britt H.S. (His Mum )
It has been 10 lonely & sad months since you've been gone, Nick, and things certainly aren't getting any 'easier' for me......it's just been so much harder. My world has been shattered, and each day is a struggle. Your Great-Papa recently turned 91 years old, and suffered a brain bleed. He refused to go to the hospital to receive treatment---that is, until I told him that YOU WEREN'T READY TO SEE HIM UP IN HEAVEN YET!!!!!! I love & miss you so much, Handsome! I miss your smile! I miss watching you draw silly pictures! Roger misses you cooking a whole dozen eggs at once----and leaving the mess on the stove for him to clean up! It's the small things that I miss the most......I want my son back!!!! Close
New Year's Day 2008 / Britt K. H.S. (Mum)
Dear Nick, We all miss you so much. A bunch of snow arrived yesterday, and even more is coming today. It is very beautiful outside, but my heart feels very sad......I will go visit you today at the cemetary. I hope that you are at peace now, no more sadness for you. Again, I miss you so much, Handsome! Close
A NOTE FROM GRAM / Becky Higgins (Grammy) Hi Nick...Christmas has come and gone for another year...you were so missed.My prayer is that you are at peace .You are so missed by us. Sometimes it is so hard to believe that you are not going to drive in the yard to stay a while or help Pa pa in the barn . Life will never be the same for us.You know that we have not seen you beautiful little boy but I know that you are watching over him . He will be alright with you at his side.We do so love you...GrammyClose
First Christmas Without You Here / Britt H.S. (His Mum )
Dear Nick, I miss you so much. I wish you were here to see the innocence of your baby sisters opening their Christmas gifts this morning. (It was very early, since they were both up by 5:30 AM, and we could only 'hold them off' until 6 AM! You & Jake used to be the same way.) Roger, Em, Kaysa, & I all went out to visit you at the cemetary. Your face looked so clear on the bench...almost like looking into the real thing. I am very sad today. I love you, Son. Close
Dear Nick, This is my first birthday without you, and I am so sad. I love & miss you more than words can say. I will be going out to visit you later, to wipe the snow off of your bench. You're ALWAYS in my heart & thoughts!!!!!
Nine Months & So Sad / Britt K.H.S. (His Mum )
Son--It has now been nine months without you. I think back to this time 20 years ago, you were having your first Christmas ever, and I was having my first Christmas as a mother. I am in so much pain now....your pain has been transferred to all of your family here on Earth. Emma, Kaysa, & Jake all miss you, too. It is difficult for me to imagine having to live the rest of my life without you. That wasn't supposed to happen.
Snow in Maine / Britt H.S. (Mum)
Dear Nick--I went out to visit you today. The cemetary was very beautiful with all the pristine snow. Seeing the snow made me feel very sad because you died when there was snow on the ground in March........memories keep flooding back. I miss you SO much that often I can't stand it!!!! I love you, Handsome! Close
Condolence/ Rosa McGrail
My heart was already broken from the loss of my sixteen year old son on February 13th however I had enough left in me to feel the broken heart and soul of another family and grieve for your tragic loss, I cried for you. That moment took your breath and there are many moments that do the same. As the days go by, and yes they are days even minutes they do not get easier they only get different, heartache is real. Today as I was on the stationary bike I found myself sobbing for your loss and mine as we celebrated Jonathan's first birthday without on Monday. I was given a gift as I stepped outside. A doe stayed within 20 and 50 feet of me for at least 5 minutes. A beautiful creature she was. As I was wondering if I could make it through the day at work as your beautiful tribute brought back my grief, she made me smile. To Brit, The pain a sibling suffers is awful and mama trying to mend a broken heart versus a scraped knee is a different heartache all together. No person will ever know your pain but as a mama will only be able to relate to it. As I advocate for awareness, as do you in a different venue, I find my heartache remains but my heart gets stronger and my soul is driven by Jonathan's strength. I feel your words as I have read them. With sincerest condolences, Rosa McGrail Close
November 29th, 2007~Your 20th Birthday / Britt H.S. (Mum)
Dear Son--This day 20 years ago brought me the most happiness, fulfillment, and joy I had ever known in my life. Today holds quite the opposite, as it brings the most sadness I have ever felt. So many hopes and dreams for your future and my future with you have vanished. I hoped that you would marry one day, so I would have the added joy of another daughter in my life. I had hoped that union would bring you children and me grandchildren to love and cherish. I had hoped to see you and Jake being best men at each other's weddings. I wanted to see you watch over your baby sisters---and make sure their future boyfriends were always treating them like ladies. (Or else!) I wanted to see you be a father to Deven. I know you can see him from Heaven and are watching over him. I placed a Memoriam in the Morning Sentinel for you today. The song, Tears in Heaven, is in it.......my wish for you is that you are at peace now, since there are NO tears in Heaven. I love & miss you beyond words, Handsome. Mum Close
Tomorrow is your 20th Birthday, Handsome... / Britt Holmstrom-Salisbury (Mum)
My Dearest Nicholas---I miss & love you so much. It was very difficult when I went to the card section to choose a birthday card for you......I've never had to pick one out for a son who wasn't alive. I picked out a 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle' cake for tomorrow, too. I probably would have picked out that kind of cake even if you were still with us---you know how silly and sentimental I can be. I remember how you & Jake loved them so much---you had Ninja Turtle curtains, Ninja Turtle sheets, Ninja Turtle blankets, toys, videos, and, most importantly, undies!!! I placed a Ninja Turtle fleecie blanket in with you at your funeral....I hope it's keeping you warm. Your Dad & Grammy Becky made you a neat 'Gone Fishin' memorial, I hope you like it. The wreath, too....it came from LL Bean's, so I know you'd think it was cool. I think about you constantly..... Love, Mum Close
Tributes and Condolences
Yesterday was Rojo's birthday, Nick. He thinks about and misses you all the time---just like I do.
Dear Nick---Today is Valentine's Day, and I think about and miss you ALL the time. Tomorrow will be 11 months since you died.....tomorrow is also Papa Don's birthday.
Received an optimistic phone call yesterday, Son. You know what it's about.....thank you for 'listening' to me, and helping this wish come true. 
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